All I can tell you about marriage after three years is that being in love still matters. I still look sideways at anybody who says that any one area of romantic partnership "isn't everything," whether it's lust and romance or compassion and friendship. Obviously no one thing is everything. But oddly, this common turn of phrase is often used to imply that the thing in question is not important. My experience so far is that it's all important.
Of course it matters that we like each other. Of course it matters that we enjoy so many of the same things and accidentally stay up until 3 on a worknight all the time to talk about a book or a movie or a piece of art.
And of course it matters that we're emotionally compatible and the way each of us process our feelings through language is easily understood by the other.
And of course it matters that we're deeply, passionately obsessed with each other. Marriage is more than just another friendship.
It all matters, and that's why we endeavor every day to deserve each other. If you've found somebody who has all these attributes, then you've gotta make an effort to be nice, to see your partner for their intentions. And hopefully, having that fundamental spark, that bedrock emotional compatibility, means being really, really good at diffusing tension with each other. When I get pissed or frustrated, MC is ridiculously good at being sweet and playful and calling me baby and snapping me out of it. But that's not just on him--it's also on me to be open to it. Three years isn't that long, but it's been long enough for me to learn that it's always worth it.
Anyway, that's my summary. I've gotta go give MC some presents. Oh, and that junk people say about never having sex after you're married is still BULLSHIT.